Is it wrong to cheat and then feel bad for coming clean?

My name is Jessica and I am 39 from Iowa, My marriage to my high school sweetheart has been in trouble for some years now.  I have tried everything in my power to keep things together but it seems the harder I tried to protect things, The more things around me seem to get. I am a stay at home mom and have been for over 10 years. We have 2 amazing kids that I wouldn’t change for the world. My husband has never cheated on me and I doubt that he ever would. I however a few months back started talking to a guy from a block over while I had the kids at the park one day. He invited us over to swim and one thing led to another and we ended up starting and ongoing affair that just ended a couple weeks ago.

Is it wrong to cheat and then feel bad?

After we stopped the fling I fessed up thinking that it was the smartest thing to do. My husband ended up finding the guy and beating his ass to the point he will forever have a messed up face. He would never hurt me and I do love him very much but I can’t help but feel really bad for the other guy…Had I not been honest he wouldn’t have ever had these problems. I don’t want him to hate me…I also can’t be attracted to him after watching him get beat up so bad…I mean for real…He got beat down.

I guess my question is this, Is it wrong if I admitted my wrong but now feel bad for being honest about it? Is it wrong that the way things happened got so far out of my control? Is it wrong that watching my husband beat the guy turned me on and re-sparked the fire I had for him?

Is it wrong to cheat and then feel bad?
Is it wrong to cheat and then feel bad?